4am..

It 4am in the morning.... and I haven't sleep, still awake... I really need somebody to listen to me right now... Text my buddy an hour ago, she didn't reply, Maybe she might be asleep already. It has been 5 days since Joel went outstation to Sarawak for work. Never been in my love life, I didn't see the face and hear my partner's voice for such a long period; yea, 5 days really sounds so long for me.. gosh, this is torturing.

Alot of thing is bugging me right now. I wanted to work abroad. Somehow bumped into a forum and got to know about Working Holiday Scheme. Where one can apply to travel and then work at another country for a short period of time. Most they are hiring people to work as fruitpicker or factory workers. Same as here in Malaysia, not many local will do this job, so same do other country. Browse thru a webpage,[ www. speedwing.org ] a site which provide such WHS thingy. Looks interesing to me but then some clicking link me to a JOB OPPORTUNITY as a pet groomer at Northland Wellintong, New Zealand. Seriously, I really wanted to go overseas and work, travel other country, be on my own, meet new people, I really wanted to. I don't know why, does this mean that my heart is wild?? I told my sis before, but she doesn't agree with me.. She have simple lifestyle, and doesn't wanted to make stuff harsh, but definately not me. I won't satisfy going on the simple road. Aside from this, I wanted to take diving course.. I wanted to go to the OCEAN but.. planning a trip is really tough as all my friends having clash of time.. What the hell.. Then, should I just go backpacking by myself??

I know what i should do now.. Save $$$ to get a Visa, apply for the WHS and go abroad!!

i want to sleep but my eyes just won't shut.. all this things is spinning inside my head. Nobody to talk to, but atleast i have this blog for me to express my feeling.